Category: Humor

Samuel L. Ipsum

This is kinda funny: Samuel L. Ipsum. I’ve linked the lite and SFW version (See the upper right hand corner for the NSFW version). It’s an alternative to the Lorem Ipsum that you find in doing dummy text. I recognized a couple of the quotes from there, namely this one from Samuel L. Jackson’s more well known roles:

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon thee.

Guess which movie this is from? Better yet, what book did he quote this from? (Thanks to Benji for the link).

Buses

I take the bus over to UW from Bellevue whenever I need to go to campus. It saves me money, gas, and car maintenance in the long run.

Whenever I’m on a bus, there’s feels like this unwritten and unspoken code for where to sit. If at all possible, unless they’re a friend of yours, create as much space between you and everyone on the bus. For example, you’re sitting alone on the bus and someone else comes on. That person can sit anywhere they want… Except for the spots adjacent to you. If a spot opens up on a crowded bus that creates space between you and the person next to you, take it immediately. Basically create space between you and the rest of the riders on the bus.

However, every so often, you get that one person that chooses to sit next to you, even though there’s a ton of other seats that would give the both of you a lot if space. As a result, you’re squeezed up against to the window, subtly holding your nose to not breathe in the the weird smell coming from their jacket. A spot opens up to create some space between you and them, yet they still choose to sit right next to you. You wait… And wait… And wait… Still not moving. Still taking in that smell from them. They finally get off on some stop and you can breathe a sigh of relief.

Today was one of those days… Not awkward at all.

Fantasy Sports

Fantasy spots. Oh boy. One moment, you love it. The next moment, you hate it.

So if you have no idea what I’m talking about… The whole idea of fantasy sports is that you’re the owner of a team of a specific sport, whether it be basketball, soccer, football, baseball, or whatever else there is out there. Before a season starts (or very early in the season), you select players to “play” for your team. Over the course of the season, they accumulate stats for your team. Depending on the format, you may face off against other teams and the team with the most points or most categories won, wins that week. Or you could try to accumulate the most stats over the course of the entire season and try to finish as high as possible. Millions and millions of people all over the U.S. and the world participate in some sort of fantasy sports. Some do it for money, others do it for pride.

When I see myself playing it, I think “Geez, this is such a roller coaster ride… Ugh.”

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